As many of my readers know Charles and I had our first baby after 11 years of marriage, then 3 years later I turned 31 and had another baby. We've been married now 15 years and although the wedding bells still ring loud and clear in my ears, it is parenting that has brought many surprising issues to the table.
We have found it is necessary to weekly evaluate the many stages are girls so quickly phase into.
It is not always an easy task being in unity as we come together and address the parenting issues that bring such daily challenges to us. We have found that it is very important to communicate on how we will deal with each demanding challenge our beautiful girls go through.
Recently I was feeling like I was not meeting up to the expectations of Charles as the Mother to his babies.....it seemed that when he would come around he would be implementing boundaries for them that I was not aware of so therefore I was not following through with them once he left. We had a long discussion on what I felt was a fight worth fighting over with a 1 year old and a 4 year old and he expressed the fights he felt were worth fighting over. It came to one common ground rule or equal expectation and that is "being consistent", which is a full time job all in it's self.
Wouldn't it be nice if parenting came with blue prints or an instructional book that way you could avoid some of these issues before that put their nasty head up.
My mother raised me and my sister on her own, I saw the hardships she faced in being a single parent, yet through it all I think she did an amazing job, she was such a great example of a loving, praying and hard working mother. I can only pray and hope that I will be as good of a Mama as my mother was. She wasn't super strict but the things she had issues with she stuck strong to them, even if I didn't understand them. Many would say she wasn't strict or consistent enough but I suppose the fruit of her labor stands the test of time and tells the critics in her day the final story.....she was an AWESOME mother under all the circumstances she raised us the best she could. (Thank you Mom)
I often tell Charles I don't know how my Mom did it, she was a strong women, is all I can say.
The most difficult challenge of all is that Charles is gone about 2 weeks out of every month, many of you military Mama's will be able to relate to this one. Well I'm the Mama and Daddy for those 2 weeks, then I am immediately suppose to take the Daddy hat off the minute he comes home.......how do you do that? Well it is not easy.....but I love him, respect him, honor him and I am submitted to him, so those in itself make it easier to defer to him as the Daddy and Man of the home. Our girls need his consistent affection, his instruction, his correction, his encouragement and his love.
Several things I have found to make these parenting challenges a bit less stressful is:
We are striving to be the best parents we can be, to raise our girls to be respectful, well behaved, God fearing women. Through all the daily challenges parenting brings, I can say at the end of the night, I am so proud and thankful God blessed us with such beautiful, healthy little girls.
For it is the challenges in life that make us who we are and what we will become.